Michael Savage has Daddy issues

As I sit here, clicking away on my keyboard, angsting over how to connect with my sons, worrying if anything we say sometimes gets through...I suddenly come to find that all I needed to do was turn to Michael Savage for parenting tips. Silly me. I had no idea Mr. Savage was an expert on autistic children and parenting and parenting autistic children. Thank the heavens we have batshit crazy people like him around to set the rest of us straight.

Kristina over at AutismVox posted about Savage's comments. They are indeed savage but far more revelatory about poor Mr. Savage than about anything else. Based on his own words, Mr. Savage apparently suffered intense verbal abuse from his father, including the horrific and deeply painful experience of having been called "a girl."

Ministers of grace, defend us. Say it ain't so! A girl? The horror.

The World According to Savage, heretofore unrecognized autism expert that he is, includes the following worthy observations:

Autistic children apparently don't have fathers who are abusive enough
"They don’t have a father around to tell them, ‘Don’t act like a moron. You’ll get nowhere in life. Stop acting like a putz. Straighten up. Act like a man. Don’t sit there crying and screaming, idiot.’”

Savage's father apparently was sufficiently verbally abusive
"Savage concluded, “[I]f I behaved like a fool, my father called me a fool. And he said to me, ‘Don’t behave like a fool.’ The worst thing he said — ‘Don’t behave like a fool. Don’t be anybody’s dummy. Don’t sound like an idiot. Don’t act like a girl. Don’t cry.’ That’s what I was raised with."

Autism is really a manifestation of overuse of sensitivity training
"That’s what you should raise your children with. Stop with the sensitivity training."

Autism and the overuse of sensitivity training are apparently a previously unrecognized method of achieving a sex change...
"You’re turning your son into a girl,..."

...and apparently, Phil Gramm is not the only person with a low opinion of US citizens
"...and you’re turning your nation into a nation of losers and beaten men."

And I'm so glad someone finally has figured out why George W. Bush exists
"That’s why we have the politicians we have.”

Last, but not least, I'd like to thank Mr. Savage for taking the heat off of vaccines and placing it directly where it obviously belongs...on bad parenting and sensitivity training. I'm sure parents of autistic children all over the country are smacking their heads in recognition and crying out, "Why didn't I think of that?!?" before picking up the nearest paddle-shaped object and beating the crap out of their children with it, screaming, "You putz! You idiot! You girl!" Unless, of course, the child is actually a girl, in which case stopping at "idiot" is sufficient.

Some people may suggest that giving attention to Mr. Savage gives him what he wants. Poor baby. Anything to help him through his father issues.